When I have an opinion, judgement, when I take a position that I cannot easily let go of, laugh at, I am caught in my own delusive mimd-made stories of me. Worse than that I perpetrate my inner separation from what is life giving and alive in me, I continue the very cycle that I instinctively recognise I need to end.
All positions are ego positions, valid from that perspective, informative for sure but when it comes to truth, we know it is a very limited and biased perspective.
Ego is a defence against vulnerability.
Vulnerability is the royal road to richness.
Relating intimately with experience, through being present with it, we come to recognise the mind is a complex producer of repetitive pattern based stories. By stories we mean creative facsimiles, the mind creates reality, it takes current data, sense data and renders a world-scape that fits its beliefs. It seems that this world is based on its surface, the colours, sounds, the surface qualities. It is dry, tight and lacking.
Everything your mind creates is based on its patterns, its learned patterns and as such is very limited and restrictive. It is often fear based and avoidance based, creating that cycle of rejecting current experience of grasping on to current experience, and rarely finds equanimity, peace and connection.
Pausing the mind-stream, even for a moment we can discover a gateway to experience beyond this fabricated thought based reality. In that moment, when we relax and bring attention away from thinking, and feel our experience we can recognise a rich fullness, a sense we are, our being-ness is felt and recognised.
Opinions, positions, stances arise, we can feel reactive, we can feel our patterns and yet this is not the truth, this is as far from truth as we can get.
Do we abandon our ego, our reactivity, our stance…? No we embrace it with our interested curiosity. We turn toward it with a willingness to open to it, to come alongside and see what is there, to feel it from the inside, and NOT to take it at face value, to feel under the surface and discover its truth, and that truth is its defensive strategy, and that leads to its soft centre, its capacity to be vulnerable and there lies the pearl.
We find our life changes shape and we get interested more and more in our thinking and stories, not in their face value, instead we start to feel them from within and trace them into their felt sense, we come to see patterns and forms and realise how limited our thinking truly is. How it is the very prison we feel trapped by. Yet we also come to see its innocence and beauty.
When I am identified with a position, this being with my experience is not possible, so it is paramount that I start to get familiar with how my whole day can move from one rigid self created position to the next, fuelling my regular sense of struggle and disconnection.
Instead of condemning that movement, we embrace it, that is we willingly allow it to be, embrace from within, we recognise it has no power, no possibility to take away our being-ness, and living from this greater perspective it is recognised and upon recognition relaxes and disappears from sight.
Interested curiosity, relaxed willingness, we approach our experience freshly, always new, never with the belief we already know what it is…
Right there in that moment is freedom…